Taco Doritos

I’ve always assumed there were two kinds of food in the world: the kind you like and the kind you don’t like. The former category is filled with pizza, pasta, and peanut butter and tomato sandwiches; the latter category is filled with okra. However, as I’ve grown older I’ve found there’s a third category: sometimes-I-like-it-sometimes-I-don’t. Oddly enough, I place Doritos into this category.

On the surface, there shouldn’t be a time where I wouldn’t like Doritos. After all, they’re crunchy, tasty, and a single serving alone satisfies my recommended hourly minimum sodium intake. But every once in a while I look at a bag of them and think, “I’d rather eat okra chips.”

The upside of Doritos is that there are a lot of flavors. If Salsa Verda doesn’t do it for me, there’s always Cool Ranch. And if I’m not in the mood for that I can grab a bag of the default Nacho Cheese flavor and play one of my favorite puns. (“Is this my cheese? No, that’s nacho cheese.” Ha ha ha. So witty.)

But then there’s the Taco Flavored Doritos, pictured above. This particular flavor would never fall into the wishy-washy category for me. No, this particular flavor is teh awesomez. The trouble is, they discontinued it when I was in junior high. True, while other taco-ish flavors came and went over the years, none of them were the real taco flavor.

Back in the 1980s, a younger Jay Leno used to hawk Doritos in television commercials. The tag line went, “Crunch all you want, we’ll make more.” This seemed like a cruel taunt to fans of discontinued flavors, such as the aforementioned Taco. Looking back, I probably could have filed a class action lawsuit for their false advertising—and won. Apart from earning enough money that I could afford to write more than one blog post a week, I could have also lived with the eternal satisfaction of knowing I was personally responsible for Frito Lay changing their tag line to, “Please be prudent with your crunching, for this may be the last bag we make.”

But perhaps it’s good I didn’t win because it’s quite possible I would have lost it all in a Frito Lay counter-suit hinged on the technicality of, “We never said when we’d make more.” Because sure enough, the original Taco Doritos are back: at first for a limited time only . . . but if rumors are true, they’re about to be added back to the permanent lineup.

I’m going to send Jay Leno an email now to confirm. But in the meantime, please be prudent with your crunching.

6 Responses to “Taco Doritos”

Anna said
May 9, 2011 at 3:12 am

funny you should mention Dorito’s. I had a run in with them last week! I have not eaten them for years! But all of a sudden I had this craving for them with melted cheese, salsa, gaucamole and sour cream.

So off I went and bought the whole chabang! About 8000 calories later, I was sated.

Not gonna do that again for a few more years!! 😉

Biz said
May 9, 2011 at 1:39 pm

I don’t even remember the taco flavor – but then again, you are a whole TWO YEARS older then us! 😀

Hands down favorite new Doritos flavor combo: hot wing and blue cheese – spicy goodness right there!

Happy Monday Charlie – we missed you at Mom’s yesterday – I think she had a nice time! 😀 I am using the extra exclamation marks just for you!

Love, your prettier sister, Biz

Biz said
May 9, 2011 at 1:40 pm

I forgot – I don’t know if you read back to my Saturday post, but I am down 1.8 last week, so 12.1 for the year – not bad!

Richard said
May 10, 2011 at 11:37 am

Since the Switch is on at the moment, I’ll have to buy a bag to eat when it’s off.

Did you eat any yet? Are they the same as you remember?

I’m often disappointed when I experience things after a long absence from them. Never quite as good as you remember.

    Charlie said
    May 10, 2011 at 9:16 pm

    They were good!

    Er . . . I mean, they were awful. I’d stay away from them. Far, far away.

Michelle said
June 21, 2011 at 5:01 am

Just have to say that I purchased a bag of Taco Doritos last Saturday at my local Meijer store.

I haven’t opened the bag yet though! Waiting for something good to watch on TV and a large pop to go with them.