First Check In

It’s Monday, November 7, 2011 and as promised, here is the first full update of My Last Diet‘s progress. If you recall from that post, fifty-seven days ago I finally made a decision: after doing this a long, long time, I decided to give this one (and only one) more shot. My reasoning? This is just getting old.


So! If this were to truly be my last diet, what would I do? It had to be something different and something sustainable. But what to do, what to do?

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For the few months prior, I actually hadn’t felt all that good and I was beginning to think maybe I had some sort of food intolerance, allergy, or even some psychosomatic thing. In situations like this, most normal, rational human beings (i.e., women) would go see a doctor. But I’m a Man Dammit and we won’t visit the doctor until we can actually see our brains on the pavement. (And even then at least two thirds of us will still claim, “I’m sure it’s nothing.”)

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My Day One plan back on September 12 was simple: 1) cut out gluten, 2) cut out dairy, and 3) just quit eating so much, you idiot. Oddly enough, just following numbers one and two nearly took care of three. By the time of my announcement, I was already down seven pounds.

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This lasted until October 5 which not coincidentally was the date of my twentieth wedding anniversary. It was a Wednesday and Laura and I decided to go out for Chinese for lunch. That seemed relatively diet-safe. So we drove to Chinese Restaurant Number One. It was closed. We drove to Restaurant Number Two. Also closed. Apparently the universe was trying to tell us something. (Either that, or I knew ordering something out of their freshwater aquarium last time would come back and bite me.) The universe then sent us to that most magical of places: Macaroni Grill. I stared at the menu for all of five seconds before it hit me.

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This was probably worth cheating, and so I ordered away. It was very good, but later that day I was struck by The Uncomfortables. Maybe this problem wasn’t all just in my head. Maybe I should stick to the plan. And so I did. That is until two short days later when I had pizza: an item neither gluten nor dairy free. I braced for the worst but oddly enough I felt just fine.

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So I did what any good scientist would do. I discarded the data, pretended my experiment never happened, and forged ahead with my new gluten and dairy free lifestyle anyway. Because at least I was losing weight. Or so I thought. Because it was also about this time that I realized I’d hit my first plateau.

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Plateaus happen. That’s just part of this game. But they don’t happen this early. At least not to me. Traditionally, once The Switch is on, I can drop ten pounds about two weeks. Getting stuck at the seven-pound mark for this long started to get a bit discouraging. And we all know there’s only one cure for diet discouragement.

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But for whatever reason, I didn’t do that. Perhaps it’s because I’m treating this as my Last Diet and I just wasn’t ready to throw in the towel so soon. So I (mostly) kept at it, (mostly) behaved myself, and definitely kept tracking every calorie over at LiveStrong’s MyPlate. It paid off on Day 53 of the Last Diet: ten pounds gone. Then Day 54 surprised me: eleven pounds gone. And as of now, I’m still hovering at the 10-pound mark. (Which will now most certainly become my next plateau.)

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So wish me luck. We’re heading full swing now into The Season. Next update: December 5, 2011.

15 Responses to “First Check In”

Helen said
November 7, 2011 at 7:22 am

Obviously what you’ve been doing is working well so I could see how that would encourage you to stay the course.

Anna said
November 7, 2011 at 8:31 am

Your drawings are so cute! And funny!! Thanks for your usual humour on this battle of wills. And well done for the loss and fighting the plateau. Wish I could say the same for myself!

Tis the season to be jolly 😀

Jenn@slim-shoppin - your really prettier sister said
November 7, 2011 at 1:06 pm

I love the picture of the lasagna! That would have jumped out at me too!

I’m going to try my hardest to stay the course – I’m starting to run again so hopefully that will help!

Biz said
November 7, 2011 at 2:54 pm

Love your drawing posts Charlie. I will let you know how my new diet goes – so far so good, but its only day 1!

Well, officially day one, but I cut out most carbs and dairy since Saturday – my blood sugar numbers are completely stable – even my blood sugar numbers 30 minutes after I eat are in the 130’s – nice!

Love, your prettier sister, Biz

Stir fry with peanut sauce for 1 | Slim Shoppin' said
November 8, 2011 at 8:05 am

[…] **** Also, check out my brother Charlie’s latest post – 1 month in to hopefully his last diet ever – how is he doing? CLICK HERE TO CHECK HIS PROGRESS. […]

Sandra said
November 8, 2011 at 9:43 am

Love the drawings!
Looking forward to your December 5th update!

    James said
    November 14, 2011 at 12:55 am

    Me too looking forward next update

Miz said
November 9, 2011 at 5:21 am

laugh and TWEET!!

    Charlie said
    November 9, 2011 at 10:36 pm

    There’s that tweeting again.

    I just . . . don’t . . . get it.

    I don’t know what I would post (repeatedly) in order to be considered active. And I can’t think of any rational person who would follow it. Yet somehow it’s the key to Social Networking Success.

    I guess I’m doomed.

MaryBe said
November 9, 2011 at 8:37 am

“It’s just a flesh wound” lmao!!
I cut out dairy (and meat) a year ago and feel great. I’ve noticed the less bread type stuff I eat, the better I feel too. Now if I could just give up my Fritos addiction…

    Charlie said
    November 9, 2011 at 10:38 pm

    On the “bread” side of things, I do think two months without Cheez-its is some kind of personal record. And I am eating a lot more tofu and a lot less meat as well. I’m not quite accidentally vegan, but certainly a step in that direction.

    I’ve been thinking about writing a post about it for a year and a half now.

Kris Winn said
November 13, 2011 at 9:59 pm

You’re a modern artist. Great post. The pics are hilarious.

Charlie said
November 14, 2011 at 12:57 pm

As I wade through the spam comments, every once in a while one makes me laugh. Today it was this one:

Hi all, I’m a recently registered poster on this here messageboard therefore I believe I would do best to mention a couple things about myself. To begin with I am 24 years of age, a girl, plus I read biology in my school. I truly anticipate eagerly speaking with you guys… Bye..

Actually, here’s another.

Thank you for the sensible critique. Me and my neighbor were just preparing to do some research on this. We got a grab a book from our area library but I think I learned more clear from this post. I am very glad to see such great information being shared freely out there.

Seriously? Does anyone actually fall for these things?

Deb said
November 20, 2011 at 7:53 am

Charlie – not to hop off the diet wagon here really but what, exactly, do these spam comments hope to achieve anyway? How would you “fall” for them and if you did, how would the spammers be ahead in any way?

Are they also driving traffic to a website somehow? There is seriously one person left in the United States who wants Canadian or Mexican prescription drugs that hasn’t figured out how to do that on their own?

Along the lines of tweeting (and again, unless I need directions to a specific type of place in a town I don’t know explain to me again why I need ANOTHER social media to keep me abreast of every waking thought passing through the minds of every person I’ve met in the past 5 years?) I just do NOT get how spam could possibly help anybody do anything. Other than annoy, of course, but there are trolls for that.

Where is that giant bottle of Geritol, anyway? It must be around here somewhere…….!!!

    Charlie said
    November 20, 2011 at 1:16 pm

    The idea of “falling for it” is that the blogger sees these glowing comments and lets them post. This gets the spammers links out across many sites, driving traffic back to their sites where they either sell snake oil, or steal others’ content to drive clicks to their own banner ads, etc. So yes, they believe there are still those out there who haven’t found the cheap drugs.