‘Tis The Season

Post ImageSomehow–and I honestly have no explanation for this–it’s December fifteenth already. That leaves no doubt: we’re definitely in The Season. And if by “The Season” you think I’m talking about any one of the eighteen or so holidays that happen between October 31 and January 2, you’d better guess again. Nope. It’s Chex Mix Season.

Not coincidentally, I wrote my first Chex Mix post essentially a year ago today. If you need to catch up on what Chex Mix means to me, go read that. I’ll wait.

See? It’s a real problem area for me. Last year, I was doing pretty darn well diet-wise. This year? Not so much. Which means that this crunchy snack has even more calories than it normally does. The Chex Mix knows when you’re weak and doubles its efforts against you.

Now if I were to sit down with a full box of regular ol’ breakfast cereal and started eating it, I doubt I could get through more than a few cups of the stuff. Odd then, how by adding nothing more than a stick of butter and two pounds of sodium, one can turn it into the bottomless snack. You know how they say birds can eat their own weight in bird seed every day? Well, substitute “Charlie” for “birds” and “Chex Mix” for . . . oh, well, you get the picture.

I made my first batches of it just this past weekend. The first batch is nine cups of cereal, one cup of pretzels, one cup of goldfish crackers (a new addition this year!), one cup of peanuts, and one cup of cashews. That might sound like a lot, but I can actually fit that in my mouth. And at two hundred degrees too. It’s amazing. I should be on television.

The second batch takes longer to eat: upwards of eight minutes. The third batch finally gets distributed to family members, which was, of course, the entire purpose of the exercise. At least I’m making sure they get only the top-quality, personally-tested snack food available.

I mean, a guy’s gotta have standards.



10 Responses to “‘Tis The Season”

tuscanystone said
on
December 15, 2009 at 6:46 am

PMSL! You are funny! I still dont know what a chex mix is (being British and all) but I’m happy for you that they only come out at xmas! Sounds like you would need rehab otherwise. Enjoy!

Tusc πŸ™‚

    Charlie said
    on
    December 15, 2009 at 9:51 am

    You can make it, Tusc! The nearest equivalent to Chex cereal for rightpondians is Shreddies. This is like our Wheat Chex, so you’ll be missing out on the Corn Chex and Rice Chex, which adds a lot to the overall flavor. Throw in some pretzels, peanuts, cashews, bagel chips, goldfish, or other crunchy bits. After that, it’s just butter, Worcestershire sauce, seasoned salt, garlic powder, onion powder. Full recipe available on 97,497,531 web sites near you.

TexasDeb said
on
December 15, 2009 at 10:52 am

Oh Charlie, you hit the holiday nail on the head.

I just finished posting about my own obsession with The Mix. I try to eat it as slowly as possible, which simply means I end up spending the entire holiday season with a bowl of Chex Mix in one hand at all times.

Well, not really, only eat the stuff while I’m awake. So far.

Deb said
on
December 15, 2009 at 12:48 pm

Hey,

Funny blog. It’s my first look at it. Do you actually want to lose weight or would that ruin the humour?

    Charlie said
    on
    December 16, 2009 at 8:37 am

    To answer the “do you actually want to lose weight?” question, click on “List of All Posts” at the top-right, and then read the fifty-six weeks’ worth of posts in the “Return to Onederland” and “Magical Mystery Tour” categories.

    πŸ˜‰

Quix said
on
December 15, 2009 at 2:43 pm

I have a soft spot in my heart for some good, yummy, homemade chex mix. I also have a soft spot in my arse if I eat too much of it. So I think I’ll take a year off making some. I’ve already got the holiday popcorn and the holiday chocolate and that’s about all the holiday crap I can take, tee hee!

I’ll just hope to run into some at a party or something. πŸ™‚

Helen said
on
December 15, 2009 at 3:58 pm

Oh goodness. Just today I was trying to decide if I was going to make a batch this year. Now you’ve made me afraid. Very afraid.

Tony said
on
December 16, 2009 at 7:22 pm
LynnMarie said
on
January 3, 2010 at 2:02 pm

Charlie I just discovered your blog today through “Lynn’s Weigh”, I nearly peed my pants laughing @ your this post on Chex Mix- Thankfully I was wise enough to know I was in no shape to handle making any this holiday season, but in a weak moment bought a small bag for my “partner”, yes of coarse I have eaten most of it! LOL it is indeed powerful stuff! Thank you for this post, now I have to catch up reading & following your blog!

    Charlie said
    on
    January 4, 2010 at 9:52 pm

    Welcome!