This is it! Never mind the eighty-five Day Ones that came before. This is the one that will stick.

Now I’m sure you’re dying to know what makes this time different from all the other times. Go on. Go ahead and ask me.

“But, Charlie, what makes this time different?”

Well, I’m glad you asked! Day One #86 is different because this time I bit the bullet and joined the gym.

Yes, that’s right. I actually did it. Never mind the cost. Never mind the time commitment. I just need to do something. (Of course, I’ve “joined the gym” before and nothing lasting ever came of it. But we’ll just “never mind” that too for the moment, agreed?)

The Date..: June 30, 2008
The Weight: 219.0

My goal is to lose twenty pounds by the time school starts. Yeah, yeah, I know. Artificial goals are pointless and never work. But this isn’t so much artificial as it is a great hope to repeat last year’s “twenty pounds in two months” miracle. I’m really ready this time. The switch is on! I’d write more now, but I’ve gotta get back to the gym. The treadmill awaits!

Day One #87

Well, that didn’t last long. What could be worse for the first week of a diet than a four-day, Fourth of July vacation? We grilled burgers and baked some yummy seasoned potatoes. I couldn’t just let all that good stuff go to waste, could I? (Perhaps the home made ice cream didn’t go to waste, but it sure did go to waist.) Time for a do-over:

The Date..: July 7, 2008
The Weight: 221.0

Now I’m sure you’re dying to know what makes this time different from all the other times. Go on. Go ahead and ask me.

“Actually, Charlie, we really don’t want to know.”

Well, I’m glad you asked! Day One #87 is different because this time I’m back in the 220s and that, you see, ruins my whole plan. Last week, when I was 219 and set a goal to lose twenty pounds, all you math majors out there will immediately realize that would put me back in Onederland: 199. Now if I lose twenty pounds, I’ll only be 201. So you see? I’m just that much extra motivated!

Now … about that next vacation.