..."I’d Love It More If
I went to McDonald’s again. It’s no secret that I’m completely without shame when it comes to this restaurant. Yes, I actually enjoy McFood. So I thought I’d share three McStories with you today.
McStory #1
This most recent trip happened to be for breakfast. One of my favorites, actually: Sausage McMuffin, “hashbrowns”, and a Diet Coke. Now that’s good eatin’.
The “hashbrowns” are good, but I simply can’t bring myself to actually call them hashbrowns. Now, I don’t have a specific definition for real hashbrowns. All I do know is that you can’t pick up real hashbrowns and eat them like a candy bar.
McDonald’s serves both Egg McMuffins and Sausage McMuffins. I thought the entire idea between having two is that one has egg and the other doesn’t. Yet invariably, when I pull up to the drive-through and ask for a Sausage McMuffin, they ask, “Do you want an egg on that?” “No I don’t want an egg on that. If I wanted a dang egg on my muffin, I’d've ordered the Egg McMuffin.” (Many years passed before I realized that they indeed are different items: even when they both have eggs. Still, the whole idea perturbed me.)
Anyway, my Sausage McMuffin was good. But I’d love it more if it weren’t burnt around the edges. It was a great disappointment after looking forward to it after so many miles of driving. (And, of course, you’re many miles away before you realize the McMuffin is burnt. Joe Pesci was right.)
McStory #2
Many years ago, I was sent to Europe a couple of times on business trips. One stop was in Paris. Another stop was in Vienna. And you know what I did in both cities? (“You went to McDonald’s?”) Damn straight I went to McDonald’s. After several days of fancy, high-falutin’, business meals, this poor boy just wanted a Big Mac.
“Bienvenue au McDonald’s. Puis-je prendre votre commande?” “Uh, yeah, I’d like a Big Mac. Um… a large fries. And … holy crap is that BEER on the menu? Give me a freakin’ beer with my Big Mac and fries! … Um, I mean … donnez-moi un freakin bier, s’il vous plait.”
I’d love it more if they did that here. And why not? It worked in Paris. It worked in Vienna. It probably works in every other country on the planet. Why not the good ol’ U. S. of A.?
McStory #3
Many years ago, but not as many as the Eurotrip, my then-four year old daughter and I were driving around town. She used to love to point out the window at various landmarks she recognized. One time, in a different part of town, she saw those famous golden arches and proudly exclaimed, “McDonald’s! We’ve been there!” This wasn’t technically true and I had to reply, “Actually, no, we haven’t been to that one. We’ve only been to the one over by our house.” Wide-eyed, she looked at me and asked in utter disbelief, “You mean there’s TWO?!”
I’d love it more if they could stay that young and innocent just a little bit longer than they do.
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on February 27, 2009 at 12:39 am
LOL…we have beer at McDonalds here in Germany too. We also have beer at the movie theater. I enjoy that more than the beer at Mc Donalds
And I LOVE the story about your daughter. That is great!
on February 27, 2009 at 5:42 am
Execellent stories Charlie and very well told. Can you imagine beer ina Micky D’s in the US?
“Hey, last night I partied so hard that I closed McDonalds”. “Of course, before the cab ride home, I ordered the mcmuffin”.
on February 27, 2009 at 6:17 am
On the second one, I was totally waiting for you to call it a Royale With Cheese.
on February 27, 2009 at 6:31 am
Good post Charlie! When Hannah was little we used to pass by McD’s every day on the way home from day care. Every time she’d ask, “can I have a happy meal?”
I told her I would make her a “mommy” happy meal at home. I had a stash of dollar store toys and whatever I was fixing for dinner, I would individually wrap for her and put a toy in her bag.
She always got so excited “what could be in the bag?” when what she had in her bag was what was on the table for everyone else!
I’ll have to ask if she remembers that!
Yep, they grow up quick!
on February 27, 2009 at 6:52 am
I bet even more people would eat McDonald’s here if they served beer.
on February 27, 2009 at 7:04 am
I too, have been to the McDonald’s in both Paris and Vienna, as well as every other foreign country I’ve ever visited!! I have a lot of food allergies, and so it is a lot of work to ask all the right questions and find out what I need to know to eat in other languages. Those golden arches are my haven away from home, where if I don’t feel like working for it, I can just relax and eat. And yes, I do struggle with the same love of the happy McFood, as you called it. Loved the McPost!
on February 27, 2009 at 7:13 am
Aw, the story about your daughter is adorable! When I went to the McDonalds in Spain, I was amazed as to how much better the food tasted!
on February 27, 2009 at 7:26 am
Oooh I actually like the muffins burnt,, it makes them seem a bit more ‘hot’ and cooked even if they’re all the same hee.
on February 27, 2009 at 7:44 am
mmmm, love Egg McMuffins…..
My kids call it Old MacDonalds. I could correct them, it would be the “right” thing to do. Instead I call it that myself and feel right with our world. If only everything were that easy!
on February 27, 2009 at 8:23 am
Do you KNOW that it’s almost time for the very rare and very awesome Shamrock Shake to make it’s annual appearance at Mickey D’s????
Hallie
on February 27, 2009 at 8:40 am
Mmmm… Shamrock Shakes.
on February 27, 2009 at 9:00 am
They have Big Mac’s in Paris?? When I was in Japan, several years ago, their McDonald’s didn’t have ANY of the same stuff, and “Large” was absolutely positively NOT “Large”.
on February 27, 2009 at 12:14 pm
I love McDonald’s hashbrowns. Back in my fast food days, I would also get the sausage McMuffin, (NO EGG!) and not one but two hash browns and a diet coke….Why the diet coke, I have no idea?? Maybe that was just to save about 500 more calories??
I love the picture of Homer! Sweet!
on February 27, 2009 at 2:43 pm
“donnez-moi un freakin bier, s’il vous plait.”
That one made me laugh so hard!!
Imagine the joy of a group of underage-in-the-US-but-legal-in-Europe college students discovering beer on the menu at MickeyD’s! Been there.
on February 27, 2009 at 3:07 pm
Hehe that last story was so cute. I love how Europe sells alcohol EVERYWHERE.
on February 28, 2009 at 6:16 pm
Holy crap, Biz is a genius! I never thought of that – I always told the Evil Genius that McD’s makes one fat and isn’t good for the body and lived with his sad little face. D’oh!
I love the mental picture of your daughter’s face when she realized there was more than one – and I agree, it would be nice of that wonder lasted a little longer than it does. Why is the world in such a hurry to suck the delight out of a child’s life??
Shade and Sweetwater,
K (who like the sausage, egg, and cheese McMuffin to hasten her eventual heart failure)
on March 1, 2009 at 9:05 pm
My morning after hangover meal was always a big mac, extra pickles, supersize fry, and a diet coke. I gave up fast food years ago and it just doesn’t taste the same anymore. Except the last time I had a few fries from a friend’s meal – damn, those were just as good as I remembered.